It took 3 1/2 hours today to manage to get an eye in and most of that time Cameron was screaming in pain. He had to be pinned down so they could acheive it and for the first time ever I was struggling to watch !!
When we left cameron phoned his dad (who had to watch our other kids) he told him it had really hurt and then said its ok dad because it had to be done and I really want an eye !!!
I have to say im questioning wether the end justifys the means anymore. Cameron definatly has a new growth in the middle of his socket and this is going to need to be treated along with the ones we have already spotted along his eyelid. The consultant was so noncommital at how they were going to resolve this and even how long steriods could keep it at bay. Im really gutted todayeven though he has an eye in its so short term and I really cant watch anymore asthey poke and prod and fill him and us with so much false hope. I want the chance to live a life where the hospital visits are minimal and one where the unknown is not full of scary thoughts !!
Hey tommorrow is another day and everything has to look brighter after a good nights sleep.
We are going to Wales to visit family for bank holiday weekend so im hoping for some smiles all round !!
No comments:
Post a Comment